Thursday 27 October 2016

FIFTEEN MILLION

FIFTEEN MILLION

Make yourselves the story guys
Make yourselves the news
Don’t let the opiate-filled masses
Walk in someone else’s shoes
Make the stories about the programmes
Make those programmes into news
Let the media world consume itself
In case the people light the fuse

Oh no! Stir up a little controversy
When you’re adapting trashy books
Make out you tried to cover it up
With lots of smouldering looks

Oh no! Now the hero’s become a bad man
When we built the story up as raunchy
Making gullible viewers slightly swoon
And find their partners a little paunchy

Oh no! We’ve adapted things too closely
When we promised that we wouldn’t
Let’s stir the story right on up again
Dare we? Can we? Oh, we really shouldn’t

Oh no! Seventeen entire people complain
I’m not convinced that’s really enough
Let’s tell them it’s been controversial and
Promise next time he’ll be in the buff

Oh yes! In other news it would appear that
Nearly fifteen MILLION proxy bakers
Seriously could find nothing better to do
Than gawp at some amateur cake-makers

Oh yes! Not one could find absolutely
Anything - Not one at all! - For pity’s sake!
Better to do with their Wednesday evening
Than watch somebody else bake a cake

Make yourselves the story guys
Make yourselves the news
Don’t let the opiate-filled masses
Walk in someone else’s shoes
Make the stories about the programmes
Make those programmes into news
Let the media world consume itself
In case the people light the fuse


Martin A W Holmes, October 2016

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