Wednesday, 16 May 2012

2SHY

“I can’t stand shy people... theyre so selfish because they make everyone else feel awkward”

So went the gist of a rant broadcast on the radio last week (or maybe, considering the time I’ve taken to pluck up the courage to publish this, it was much longer ago) which was reported to me by the tried and tested route of “Chinese Whispers” so I cant honestly say how much actual truth is in it, or how much “reckoning” is going on there, but the spirit behind that particular thought is so mean that I thought that it was worth commenting upon further, if that isn’t too much of a problem for you…?

Assuming of course, that it ever really existed.

Speaking as someone who has spent years feeling almost cripplingly awkward in social situations, it comes as a further crushing blow to my limited self-esteem to discover that I was actually right all along and my mere presence was actually putting everyone else on edge after all.

How very selfish of me not to have realised…

How very upsetting and unsettling it must have been for you all to have to tolerate having me around, not joining in, feeling left out and generally not knowing how to act…

How very difficult that must have made things for you...

I really am so terribly sorry and, if you like, I’ll just take myself off on a long walk down that very short pier over there and try not to trouble you with my humble and insignificant presence ever again.

Sorry… So sorry… So really very sorry…

But before I go I ought to apologise as well for disagreeing with you so vehemently. Well, I say “vehemently” but what I really mean is with the tiniest of squeaks that might just imply that you’re probably, but by no means certainly, wrong in your opinion on this.

Erm… I suppose that what I’m trying to say here is, and I really wouldn’t want to upset you or anything… You know…? Rain on your parade… B-b-b-because you’re obviously totally convinced that you are completely right about everything, and it would obviously only be some foolish insect, some insignificant worm who could only dream of one day becoming something even remotely resembling a human being, who would dare to even imply that your magnificence might be in any way even remotely thought of as being anything less than one hundred percent perfect in every way…

But…

I… really… do… have to beg to… er… disagree with your observation, even though I’m sure that you and all your mates have discussed it and debated it at length and obviously come to this inevitable conclusion through the sheer genius of your massive combined intellects and having this insignificant gnat gnawing away at something that is so obviously what the vast majority of the human race so rightly “reckon” must be very irritating for you…

How very unbearable that the blitzkrieg of the sheer fabulousness of being you in your self-absorbed little world might have been ever so slightly dented by the presence of someone who dared to feel a bit worried and a trifle upset by their own feelings of inadequacy and shortcomings when faced by someone filled with supreme overconfidence and a superiority complex so massive that you could probably attach cables to it and run a small sun off it.

That the crippling self-doubt that some of us, you’ll be surprised to discover, having obviously never experienced such a thing yourself, occasionally feel, might somehow impinge on the whale of a good time that you were obviously having until someone like me turned up and completely ruined it for you, is something me and my kind can only humbly apologise for all over again and, luckily, we’re unlikely to ever be able to summon up the courage to come within a thousand miles of you ever again, so you’re probably quite safe to vanish up your own fundament without having to worry that someone who feels slightly more vulnerable than you ever will be would be around to see it.

Really jolly well done to you.

You’re obviously best.

And don’t you just know it…?

7 comments:

  1. Confidence works at many levels. It can be a quiet thing or and arrogant shout. The arrogant shout is often fear in disguise, whilst the quiet thing is usually born out of feeling comfortable.

    My daughter is so shy that she can't go into a shop on her own, she can however go off to weekend pop festivals. She can't travel by bus, but she can take the train. She doesn't like people looking at her, but she has red hair and nose studs.

    I don't know, I really don't.

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  2. Uh yes, and... Hush, hush, eye 2 eye

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  3. I heard that radio programme and it made me furious.
    It's infinitely preferable to be shy than to be loud, ignorant, and lacking in sensitivity.

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    1. So it did actually happen then...? Well, that's a relief... (even though it isn't, if you see what I mean...?)

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    2. Yes, I heard it on Radio 2 - in fact I might have been the source of the Chinese whispers, thinking about it. She did indeed say shy people were selfish and should think less about themselves and make more effort with others. They also had a therapist specialising in social anxiety to provide some balance, but he got shouted down by this horrible woman. I can't remember who she was now. She had a really annoying voice too.

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    3. Someone phoned in to the programme and quoted to this woman: "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt."

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    4. Marvellous...!

      Maybe there's still some hope in the world after all... :-)

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