Thursday 20 December 2012

A CHRISTMAS TALE IN 25 PARTS: PART TWENTY


Mr Snatch really didn’t cut much of a dash any more as he stood all alone amongst the wreckage of civilisation without even any shoes or socks to call his own. He knew that his expensive suit trousers would never be the same again and he’d never before been as happy that he’d listened to his mother’s advice to always wear a vest as he had been during that long night spent out in the cold.

Happily, as he scrambled about in the dust, he came upon a couple of discarded (or perhaps lost) boots of dubious pedigree which almost fitted him, despite the fact that they were not a pair, and were both made for left feet, and neither was without its fair share of holes.

Nevertheless they were enough to protect his feet from the harsh points and shattered rubble that lay amongst this landscape and they would have to do until he was able to find something better to replace them, and his feet, which for a long time had been clad in little other than the finest bespoke hand-stitched and beautifully crafted leather which tended to fit like a glove, were grateful of any kind of protection as he began his long trudge towards the only visible sign of life he had so far seen in this god-forsaken place.

What troubled him most was that, once again, he had been brought to somewhere cold, almost as if somebody somewhere was trying to make some kind of colossal point about something, but as he shivered at the sharpness of the biting wind, he realised that a vest, some Italian silk and a non-matching pair of borrowed boots was not going to keep him warm enough, and getting nearer to that distant fire was already becoming his main immediate aim, and hopefully he would be getting there before that weak sun dipped below the horizon.

He had plenty of time to think as he made that long trek through the wasteland. After all, he wasn’t really certain whether he was actually here or not. Yes, he had been able to interact with Olive, however uselessly, and yes, Mr Snipe’s daughter had been able to hand him a glass of warm punch and hang up his sodden clothes, and, of course, his footprints had appeared in the snow so that those hounds would have been able to track him down.

If it hadn’t been for that one act of kindness shown by Mr Snipe himself in taking pity on a stranger, he trembled to think about what might have happened, but he still didn’t seem to be making any difference to anything, and whenever he got too close to being able to be an effective force for change, he got whisked away and shown something else instead which also, inevitably, seemed to be his fault in some small way.

Would the strange powers that were constantly shifting him around actually have allowed him to die in one of these places? Would they be that cruel? Or were they just showing him the consequences of his actions, or even the actions of his ancestors, in the hope that he might emerge from the experience a “better” and not a bitter man in some way…? There was much to ponder on, and he was grateful of the distraction as it stopped him from thinking about how cold it was getting.

Thankfully, as the last fingers of daylight caressed the night sky before bidding adieu, he arrived at the base of the twisted mess of iron and steel which formed the ivory tower, and was not at all surprised that it appeared to resemble his own tower back at home, wherever that was. It was almost as if someone had picked it up and shaken it so that most of the insides were now on the outside, and it might almost be said to be an inversion or perhaps an explosion of the tower which part of him still believed that he was perhaps still sleeping within.

Tentatively he entered what appeared to be currently acting as a doorway, and shouted a feeble “Hello…?” before following it with a louder, more confident variation.

“HELLO!!?”

But no response came out of the darkness, even though it did appear that somebody was living here. He stepped further and further into the familiar yet unfamiliar lobby and headed for the glimmer of light which seemed to indicate signs of life coming from upstairs, and tripped over an old trunk, spilling its contents all over the floor.

He was rather grateful to find that the trunk contained some almost perfectly and most definitely carefully preserved clothing and he threw on an overcoat which seemed to fit him terribly well and resembled the one which he had hung in his own office on that very last morning before the party.

It even still had his own invitation in an inside pocket, and he opened it up to find that the dancing blue cube still seemed to be working, even after everything else that had happened. He reached into the other pockets, but didn’t find anything else that was useful, but then he remembered that he usually had a pen on him somewhere and he fished into his own soggy trouser pockets and did indeed find one tucked into one of them, alongside, bizarrely, that strange triple (and more) sided card bearing Marley’s message that had been on his desk and which he was sure that he had thrown away.

Typically, he still didn’t actually read what was written upon it, which caused the watching Marley to roll his eyes in utter frustration at the idiocy of the man he was dealing with, but instead scribbled a quick note of introduction to whomsoever it was who turned out to be living here.

Then he tucked both into a pocket of his overcoat and headed upstairs towards the light, where he thought he could hear a familiar sounding noise, a noise that seemed so bizarrely out of context that he almost couldn’t believe his ears.

Was that an episode “The Good Life” that he could hear blaring out from a TV set somewhere…?

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