Sunday 18 December 2011

THE GHOSTS OF CHRISTMAS TELLY PAST (part eighteen)

Christmas 1977 found a strange collection of carol singers turning up on the metaphorical doorstep that was the cover of that year’s Christmas and New Year Double Programmes Issue of the TV Times (cost 26p). Brian Murphy and Yootha Joyce, TV’s “George and Mildred” were either being harangued by or were joining in with, depending upon your point of view, the carolling delights supplied by Harry Secombe and a pretty young looking Bonnie Langford. Now, Bonnie has come in for a great deal of criticism across the decades, but I’ve always had a lot of respect for her, not least because she’s only six days older than I am but seems to have achieved a heck of a lot more than I ever am likely to.

The Christmas Eve of that year thrills me in ways many of you will never understand and yet also shows the sedentary lifestyle I was leading whilst Miss Langford was busy becoming a child superstar, although I hope beyond all that is reasonable that her mother wasn’t one of those “pushy” ones, desperate for her darling to succeed where she herself had not. No danger of that under our roof where the brilliant and thrilling delight of “Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea” brightened a dull winter’s pre-Christmas morning. After this, of course, the thrills are less apparent with a “World of Sport” consisting of Darts, Snooker and Wrestling followed, although Eric Morecambe was there as a “special guest” to liven things up. After a western movie (“The MacAhans”) there was a “Celebrity Mr and Mrs” and a “New Faces” giving more “Wannabes” their big chance, but the thrills to this geeky heart return with “The Man from Atlantis” and “McCloud” punching through the stuff my parents watched like “The Rag Trade” and “Bing Crosby’s Merrie Olde Christmas” which, we are told, was recorded just before his death the previous October on a golf course in Spain.

Christmas Day started with carols and church before another “Merry Morning” with Jimmy Tarbuck was unleashed upon an undeserving world. Later on, the tale of “Robinson Crusoe and the Tiger” and an hour of “Just William” led up to the Queen’s message in Silver Jubilee year. After that, an hour and a half of “Film Fun” narrated by Frank Muir and called “To See Such Fun” followed before Rod Hull and Emu had “Emu’s Christmas Adventure” with Arthur Lowe. The nation then eased into Christmas night  with Julie Andrews on “The Muppet Show” and a “Sale of the Century” before Big Crosby was resurrected once again for a “Stars on Sunday” special a.k.a. “Stars on Christmas Day” (for ’twas indeedy a Sunday). “Young Winston” then got a Christmas Day outing before Stanley Baxter did his then annual Christmas ITV thing before the singists returned and the Archbishop of Canterbury, in the form of Dr Donald Coggan, got to say a few words.

Boxing Day was full of nostalgic treats from the point of view of someone my age. Chorlton the Dragon went to the Ice World, as he now seems to have on at least three Christmases I have recently reported on, but programme names like “Rainbow”, “Clapperboard” and “Pufnstuf” still send a tingle through me in a way that “Star Spangled Soccer” or “This is Your Life – Earl Mountbatten of Burma” never will. Ah well, at least that old favourite “The Guns of Navarone” passed an afternoon, if not a peaceful one, and then there’s another tingle at the prospect of “The Ghosts of Motley Hall” having a “Phantomime”. Granted after that it’s not all that thrilling at all, as it falls into the mundane pleasures of “Opportunity Knocks”, “Coronation Street”, “George and Mildred” and “The Best of Benny Hill” but what are you going to do? Well ITV had to, and what they chose to do was make sure that “Vera Lynn Sings” right up until the late-night feature film “Gumshoe”.

New Year’s Eve morning got all thrilling again with more adventures aboard the submarine “Seaview” and an episode of “The Six Million Dollar Man” and the cultish theme continued after “World of Sport” and a new series of “Celebrity Squares” with more “Man from Atlantis”. Granted, after that the year fell a little flat with more “New Faces”, another “Sale of the Century” (surely, by definition, there can be only one…?) and the film “Mutiny on the Buses”, but the first one-man show by the bright new star that was Paul Daniels was there to save us… “and that’s magic!” Unhappily he magicked us all up to Scotland to face Andy Stewart, Moira Anderson and Kenneth McKellar greeting 1978.

Oh… joy…

New Year’s Day 1978 meant, amongst other things, “Space:1999” (it was once the future, you know…), “Stars on Ice” (I bet you thought that was a recent idea…) and “Swanee River” with Don Ameche. But it also meant “The Muppet Show” with Peter Sellars and “dear old Larry”, Laurence Olivier presenting “The Best Play of the Year… 1973 – Saturday, Sunday, Monday” by Eduardo de Filippo.

Who said that all the culture had to be on the BBC? Mind you, it did follow the film “Doctor In Trouble”, so what do I know?

3 comments:

  1. From FizzBok:

    BH: Not read all of them, but just to say I'm really enjoying these 'blasts from the past' - thank you sir !

    MAWH: My pleasure... and thank you.

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  2. I too have been really enjoying these slips down Christmas' memory lane. Where there's blame there's a claim. Such ads were merely a twinkle in a carpet bagger's mind back then. Anyway back to the telly. Some of the programmes mentioned do make one think that without an audience held captive by only three channels many of them wouldn't have been watched by anyone. What I mean is there was a lot of the same celebrity crap we have now. Are we in such a different place?

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  3. Ah - Space 1999 - pink hair and sticky out breasts.

    Thanks for these useful reminders of telly when it was telly Martin.

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