TALES OF THE RIVER BANK

When we first moved to the grey box next to the canal and on the opposite side to the sewage works a couple of years ago, you may recall a posting I made about the rat, the barges and the used prophylactic, and that our beloved leader remarked "It's like 'Tales of the Riverbank' round there, isn't it…?"

Well, it's more of a canal bank, really, given that it is actually a canal, but never mind…

Well, I arrived the other day to find out that, despite the fact that the BBC claim that it's not just me but that none of us are having much in the way of sex lives any more because of our addiction to social media, the paraphernania from someone's idea of a night of passion was littering the car park on the morning after the night before, leaving evidence of activities involving a certain amount of canal knowledge (Ho, ho…)

Well, it seems that somebody didn't get the memo, and certainly not the email...

I sometimes think that I have become a real prude in recent times, although there is the probability to consider that I always was one…

Either that or I just love (in its most ironic sense of "not loving it at all") being reminded that everyone else is having a lot more "fun" than I am, but nevertheless, the contents of the "Buzz Kit" left me rather surprised and bewildered about the lifestyles of others, much, alas, as it always has, but still, whoever it is who writes the copy for the packaging is obviously having a good puntastic old time.

As m'coll said when I sent him the picture:

Oh dear me... Looks like those people with dogs or something have been again. Zooming in on that photo and it does say at the bottom that it's from that high street "summer" shop. I thought everyone had gone off that kinda thing. According to BBC anyway?

Of course the question is did it set the lights and the "sound" warnings off did the alarm not go off or did it give the person monitoring it a thrill?

Perhaps they like the danger.

Well, this set me thinking. Maybe that BBC story reminded them of what they'd been missing and had founded them dashing from the shopping centre in such excitement that getting home just wasn't even a possibility…? Now, judging (and I can be so very "judgy") by the carrier bag they also left behind after the various deeds were no doubt done, maybe they aren't online shoppers anyway, which again supports the "dashing away from the shopping centre" theory…

And perhaps maybe their own buzzing from the "2 x power packs included"drowned out the alarm…?

During our speculation-filled office chat afterwards, we did find ourselves wondering quite what the Window Cleaner would have to say about it all if he knew…? After all, his opinions upon all sorts of matters are beginning to gain quite legendary proportions amongst the staff of our humble yet strangely enticing building.

Because it does seem as if an industrial estate next to a canal just across from a sewage works is a very classy place to take someone for a bit of a romantic interlude. I mean, I may not be the most understanding of chaps when it comes to keeping a relationship "interesting" so I may not understand there appeal of such a venue which, I suppose, probably explains a lot about my relative lack of historical success in that department…

Still, it is nice to know that someone's still out there having a good time…

((Although, given that it's me who is saying it, you can probably take that use of the word "nice" with a pinch of salt because it's more than likely to make me as grumpy as hell…))