BORED WITH IT NOW

I have become so very bored of blogging in recent days... or, at least, bored with the idea of it.

No, that's not strictly true...

I'm not bored with the idea of blogging, more with the idea of me doing it.

It's a subtle distinction, I'll grant you, but at least I know what I mean, even if my mind seems far too befuddled again to actually get the point across. The interest remains, however slight it may be, but my ability to actually sit down and do it seems to have gone.

To be honest, though, I'm struggling to be interested in pretty much anything at the moment, which is probably a very dangerous place to be emotionally and professionally...

I've got books to read but I can't be bothered reading them.

I've got CDs to listen to, but I can't be bothered playing them.

I've got films I could watch, but I don't fancy watching any of them.

I've got TV shows to catch up on, but it's far, far too much effort to actually sit down and watch them.

I've got things I want to write, but can't be bothered writing them.

I've got other things that I should write but I don't want to write them.

I've got thoughts I should think but I don't seem able to think them.

I've got word games I could play, but I'm no longer interested in playing them.

I've got forms I should complete, but I can't be bothered filling them in.

I've got letters I should write, but I can't be bothered writing them.

I've got jobs I should do, but don't seem able to do them.

There are conversations that I ought to have but I don't want to have them.

There are calls I should make, but I can't bring myself to make them.

There's shopping I should do but I don't seem to want to do it.

There are people I should see, but I don't want to see them.

There are places I should go, but I don't want to go there.

There are things I should do, but I don't want to do them.

I had four days at home recently, right at the start of the month which ought to be the busiest of the year and I achieved almost nothing during those ninety-six hours and more.

I had finally made an appointment with the family solicitor to try and sort out the probate situation regarding my mum's estate and, because it was arranged for a Tuesday afternoon, it made sense to take a couple of those unused annual leave days which I'd so spectacularly failed to use this year and attach Tuesday afternoon to the nearest available weekend with a view to giving me a proper chance to have a break and "recharge" my massively drained batteries, but somehow my failure to get anything done has left me feeling hopeless and exhausted again and, as the saying goes, not in a good place.

So, if things do finally fizzle out in these parts for a while, as it sincerely looked as if it might when I was studiously avoiding my keyboard over that weekend, don't be at all surprised.

I'm sure things will perk up again soon, but I'm just not entirely sure quite when that might be...