SWALLOW DIVE

SWALLOW DIVE

I was making two slices of toast for my tea

(Warburton’s Wholemeal does it for me)

They were in the toaster browning some more

Two knives got dug out from the cutlery drawer

With butter uncovered (The light Lurpak stuff)

And the last of the Sun-Pat – There was almost enough

You know - I couldn't do it again if I tried

Setting out toppings and a plate on the side

A jar of white pepper it just swallow-dived

Honestly - I couldn't do that again if I tried

The toaster went pop as they are known to do
Hot toast was revealed just of the right hue
It was swiftly transferred to the waiting plate
As it cooled it would suffer a cruel twist of fate

Though first slabs of butter were amply applied
Plus all the dregs of the Sun-Pat that I could find

You know - I couldn't do that again if I tried

The jar of white pepper it just swallow-dived

Yet of my supper - I was somehow denied

Believe me - I couldn't do that again if I tried

Into the cupboard I put the near-empty jar back

Which is when the pepper went on the attack
It leapt for its freedom and jumped from the shelf
Hit the plate right on the edge on releasing itself
Afterwards it all looked much as it had done before
Except two slices of toast were face-down on the floor

You know - I couldn't do it again if I tried

Landing right on that plate I’d put on the side

That jar of white pepper it just swallow-dived

Really - I couldn't do that again if I tried

Martin A W Holmes, January 2017